“Help! My Child Used My Card to Buy Online Games!” — How to Request a Refund & Prevent Future Surprises  

Finding credit card or debit card purchases on your account that you didn’t expect can be alarming, but even more so when you realize it’s your child who ran up the bills. 

A parent posted their experience on Reddit: 

“My 9-year-old son used my debit card to purchase nearly $400 in online games without my knowledge, in the middle of the night. I’ve requested and received refunds from the products purchased through Steam, but the bulk of the transactions (~$300) involve Nintendo eShop. They have a strict no-refund policy when it comes to downloadable content. What are my options, if any? I need this money back in my account, so I can pay bills. I’m in Illinois, if it matters.“

Nearly 1 in 5 (22%) of parents responding to a 2024 Lending Tree survey said their child made an unauthorized purchase on their card. In addition, nearly a third (31%) of parents surveyed who said they allowed their child to use their credit or debit card said they regretted it. 

Confession: I was that child once. My mom lent me her credit card to buy a dress for an event, and I also bought a pair of shoes, a handbag, and jewelry to go with it. 

What options do you have as a parent if you find your child has gone on a spending spree using one of your cards? I’ll cover your responsibilities as a cardholder, circumstances when you can seek a refund, and, perhaps most importantly, how to prevent the charges in the first place.

What’s Your Legal Responsibility?

First, let’s distinguish between your rights as a credit cardholder and a debit cardholder. 

Under the Fair Credit Billing Act, a federal law that covers credit and charge card transactions, cardholders are responsible for no more than $50 in unauthorized purchases. 

Most card issuers waive that amount with zero liability policies.

You can dispute unauthorized purchases by asking the merchant for a refund or by initiating a chargeback, which is a dispute you file with the card issuer.  

Debit card transactions fall under a different law, the Electronic Funds Transfer Act (EFTA). You also have the right to dispute unauthorized transactions under the EFTA. 

If you report the loss or theft of your card within two business days of learning that it has been lost or stolen, your maximum liability is $50. 

But wait too long, and that limit goes up to the entire account balance, plus any overdraft line of credit. 

As with credit cards, many issuers offer zero liability policies so you won’t be on the hook for fraudulent charges if you report them right away. 

In addition to the fact that debit cards potentially expose you to larger losses, the big difference between the two types of payment cards is that with a debit card, the funds are deducted from your account right away. 

With a credit card, you can withhold payment on the disputed amount while the issuer investigates your complaint. It’s also worth noting that unauthorized use generally refers to someone using a lost or stolen card or card number. 

Here, though, a child used their parent’s card without permission. If you give your child or anyone else your card number to make a purchase, you’ve authorized them to use that card for future purchases as well. 

Seeking a Refund for ‘Friendly Fraud’

A family member using a card without the cardholder’s knowledge sometimes falls under the category of what’s informally called “friendly fraud”. It can complicate things, but it doesn’t rule out the possibility of getting a refund. 

Over a decade ago, the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) took action against several major companies for billing practices that resulted in unauthorized charges for in-app purchases on parents’ accounts. Those actions resulted in some fairly significant refunds for consumers: 

• Apple settled an FTC complaint that the company billed consumers for millions of dollars of charges incurred by children in kids’ mobile apps without their parents’ consent. It agreed to provide at least $32.5 million in refunds and to modify its billing practices going forward. 
• Google agreed to provide a minimum of $19 million in refunds to consumers who were charged for their children’s in-app purchases using apps downloaded from the Google Play store to play on Android phones. Google also agreed to modify its billing practices to help ensure consent for these purchases.
• In a lawsuit against Amazon, a federal judge granted the FTC’s request for summary judgment. The case alleged the company billed consumers for unauthorized in-app charges incurred by children.

More recently, the FTC obtained two multi-million dollar settlements against Epic Games, the creator of the popular video game Fortnite, alleging the company “deployed design tricks, known as dark patterns, to dupe millions of players into making unintentional purchases”.

If you find yourself in this situation, the first step is to reach out to the customer service department immediately. Politely explain the situation and ask for a refund. 

If that doesn’t work, the next step may be to escalate the dispute to an executive contact at the company. Elliott Advocacy publishes a list of executive contacts along with helpful tips for filing a complaint. 

If they are unresponsive or deny your request, you may want to file a complaint with the Federal Trade Commission. Companies don’t want to be the next target of an FTC investigation, so these steps alone may resolve the problem. 

What about filing a dispute with the card issuer? That’s certainly a parent’s right, but there are some potential drawbacks to that approach. 

First, if they paid for these purchases with a debit card, the money has already been taken out of their account. The EFTA generally gives the issuer up to ten business days to complete their investigation of unauthorized charges. 

If it needs more time, the issuer must provisionally credit the account with the disputed amount. 

But in this case, since it was their family member who bought the games using a payment method that was stored on the account, it will likely be harder to allege unauthorized use. 

Another possible consequence: Disputes may land consumers on “chargeback blacklists” designed to prevent the abuse of dispute processes to defraud merchants. 

This should not be a deterrent to filing legitimate disputes, but sometimes it makes sense to try to resolve the issue with the seller first. 

How to Prevent Your Kids From Racking Up Charges

The bigger lesson here for parents is that you need to try to prevent this situation before it happens. Here are a few steps to consider: 

1. Explain how cards work. Your kids see you using credit and debit cards, but do they understand you ultimately pay for those purchases? The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB) offers free resources to help you have these conversations. 
2. Set limits. Decide how you will handle unauthorized purchases and explain to your children what happens if they use your cards without your permission. Then enforce those consequences if they overspend. 
3. Use alerts. Although they can sometimes be annoying, text alerts to your mobile device will let you know when a charge has been made to your account. The longer you wait to dispute these types of purchases, the more difficult it may be to get a refund, so getting a notification right away can prove invaluable.
4. Consider using a credit card. For stored transactions, a credit card may be a safer option than a debit card, since funds won’t immediately be deducted from your linked checking or savings account. It gives you time to dispute unauthorized transactions before you have to pay for them, and if you can’t get a refund, you will be able to pay for them over time (with interest). 
5. Use a virtual card number. Your card issuer may allow you to create a one-time virtual card number for purchases that gives you more control over how it is used. These can be especially helpful for trial purchases. 

The top piece of advice here, though, is to set up parental controls on any accounts your kids can access. Whether it’s a shopping site like Amazon or a gaming site like Nintendo, you want to make it hard for them to buy without looping you in first. 

Steps for setting these controls vary by platform, but investing a few minutes now can save you (and your child) from a painful financial lesson later.